Aeroplane Spoons and Pop Tunes From 2000
WORDS Briar Pomana (she/her)
Briar illuminates the pop culture timeline and its pioneers that have led us to the sonic and aesthetic world we call home today.
She knows the outline of her lips off by heart, spritzing a fun, fruity perfume over her shoulder. The smell travels back to our car seats and her glitter-eyes watch on from the rear view. She wears Juicy Couture and isn’t like regular mums - her steering wheel is fluffy and matches her fuschia-blushed cheeks. Her pinkalicious cellphone’s ringtone is by Nelly and it buzzes to the tune of 'Dilemma', but just Kelly’s part in the chorus. The 2000s mum isn’t fazed by how passers-by gawk at her femininity and Christina Aguilera-influenced box-dyed hair. Her brows are thin, but stare at her for two seconds too long and they’ll turn into pistols.
These mums are quick to defend Gwen, but only if we’re talking about her No Doubt days, because it was the 90s and no one knew any better. They wear their jeans low and heels wedged like they’re in a Mary J. Blige music video. Fedoras for when they’re feeling like Ne-Yo’s Miss Independent and big face-swallowing sunnies like Mariah.
When we were kids we watched on as our mums strutted hallways to 'Crazy in Love', showing us what it took to be a Y2K baddie. Studying them like our Jonas Brothers posters, we have perfected the 2000s mum era. We have manifested our future selves by the ritual of time-relapse and Britney Spears. We mustn't be blamed for the fabulous foxes we have morphed into, when we are the products of the OG bimbos. Mums in the 2000s era are as iconic as the music they fed us on aeroplane spoons and we, the glitter girlies, now grown, must carry on the tradition of catchy clothes and pop songs.